16 June 2010 ~ 6 Comments

Conversation 6/16/10: Stabbed, Shot, and Beheaded

This conversation took place this morning between Akiyama, Mrs. Betty and I in the teacher’s office:

Me: What’s wrong? You look upset…

Akiyama: A girl was… (she thrusts her hand at me in a stabbing motion with an invisible knife) with a knife!

Me: Stabbed? A girl got stabbed?? Where? Here?

Akiyama: No, at another school in Yokohama. A high school.

Me: Wow! Did she die?

Mrs. Betty: (upon hearing the word “die”) Did who die?

Me: The girl who got stabbed.

Mrs. Betty: Got what???

Akiyama- A girl…stabbu ded another girl…they were both students.

Mrs: Betty: Stabbu ded??? What is stabbu ded?

Me: Sashimashita (stabbed)!

Mrs. Betty: (Says something to Akiyama in Japanese I can’t catch but my mind says: Oh goodness gracious me) Kowai! (It’s scary)

Me: Did she die?

Akiyama: No, she was taken to a Hospital and…she is still alive!

Mrs Betty: (Claps her hands together and says something in Japanese. I hear: Thank you, Jesus!)

Me: Yep, she’s lucky! Why did the girl do it, anyway? Was she being bullied?

Akiyama: I heard she thought the other girl was too noisy or annoying or something…

Me: Ah.

Akiyama: How can you be so…? I mean, It’s shocking isn’t it?

Mrs. Betty: I’m not surprised at all. There are many students with mental problems in these schools…and most of them never get help. I’m only shocked it doesn’ happen more often.

Me: Me too.

Mrs. Betty: One day a student is going to bring a gun to school, or a…nanto ka…katana…how do you say katana in English?

Me: Sword.

Mrs. Betty: Yes, a sword, and really hurt somebody. Maybe another student. Maybe even a teacher! 

Akiyama: (looking around, though all the known English speakers in the office were sitting right here) You shouldn’t say such things…so loud.

Mrs. Betty: Why not? 45 years I’ve been teaching and I’ve taught some crazy kids. I mean CRAZY! (she says something in Japanese…I hear: crazy as sprayed roaches)  And I know some of them belong in a hospital or somewhere…not in a school with normal kids. So, maybe if that happens they will finally get serious about the mental health problems in the schools.

Me: Well, I hope I’m not the one that has to take a bullet or get beheaded for the cause…

Mrs Betty: Take a bullet?

Me: Uchikorosu. (Shot and killed)

Mrs: Betty: Eeeee! (says something…I hear: If that don’t put pepper in the gumbo!)

Akiyama: Beheaded?

Me: (I make the universal sign for beheading, a chopping motion with my hand aimed at my neck) Uchi kubi ni suru.

Akiyama: Sokka. (I see.)

Mrs. Betty: (says something to me in Japanese. I hear: Tie me to an anthill and fill my ears with jam!) You know some strange Japanese words, Loco-Sensei, don’t you?

Me: What can I tell you? I’m from New York.

PS: Mrs. Betty is now on Facebook and Twitter 


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6 Responses to “Conversation 6/16/10: Stabbed, Shot, and Beheaded”

  1. Michael 17 June 2010 at 1:32 am Permalink

    Fantastic. For some reason, I'd thought that I'd stuff schoolyard knifings behind in Canada. Is there prostitution in the schools here like there is back home? Do the schools have cops like we had?

    • Locohama 17 June 2010 at 8:10 am Permalink

      Hey Michael…yep, in the HS they've got prostitutes…but no cops yet. They're too busy harassing gaijin about their bicycles and whatnot (-: Thanks for the shout as always

  2. Roberto 17 June 2010 at 2:11 am Permalink

    The best work in the schoolyard knifing field is currently being done in China. I believe there will be a symposium in Hefei later this year on the subject. It's bring-your-own-chopper.

    Remember that kid who actually DID behead his classmate a few years ago (okay, 10 years ago)? Left the head stuck on the gate of the junior high school (yes, here in Japan). Now THAT boy had issues.

    • Locohama 17 June 2010 at 7:02 am Permalink

      @Roberto yeah, I think I'll pass on that symposium, but if you go take vide will ya? Love to see it…lol Nah that beheading is before my tenure but it sounds about right with some of the issues I see in the halls and classes.

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