13 February 2011 ~ 2 Comments

Lay off the Jukujo!!!

Ran into a friend of mine last week. He reads my blog. Digs it…sometimes. Took issue with the last two posts though, so I heard him out.

“That was some funny shit,” he said, mouth smiling, eyes? Not so much. “I’m just trying to figure out what you got against jukujo? !”

“HUH???” I was aghast. “Why the fuck you say that?”

“Just lay off ’em!”

WTF!! “What did I say???”

“I don’t know…it’s in your tone. Sounds like you’re taking a little snipe at them. Aren’t you?”

“Hellllll na!” I said, shaking and scratching my head, thinking back over what I’d written, trying to remember my tone. “Really?? I sounded like I had it in for jukujo???”

“I’m just saying, man…it surprised the hell outta me cuz I know how you get down!”

“You motherfucking right!” I snapped. “That’s why I can’t believe my tone could be misconstrued this way. But, don’t worry, I’ll look into it, and rectify it if necessary…”

I came home and read over parts one and two of my little Jukujo in the Pink series, and I couldn’t find anything that hinted that I had negative thoughts are feelings towards jukujo in general.

Did any of you?

In fact, I was hard-pressed to find a verse or phrase that indicated I had any feelings whatsoever about them. Maybe that was the problem.


You ladies might want to cover your ears or grab barf bags…

Ok. For the record…

I♥ jukujo熟女 , bimajyo 美魔女, or whatever you want to call them. I really do. Not only that but I’m indebted to them. I can honestly say the ONLY reason Loco is not running around Yokohama loony as a looney tune, coo-coo for fucking Cocoa Puffs, is due to the kindness, generosity, intelligence, character, sexual prowess and, I ain’t afraid to say it: LOVE. The unadulterated Love Jukujo have sent my way has been off the fucking charts fantastic! Best I’ve ever had, bar none.

Japanese men, for the most part, are just too damn intimidated, or effete, or just so filled with stereotypical ideas about me that I don’t even feel mildly motivated to suss them out and form durable relationships anymore. I mean, I used to make a considerable effort but over the years, after suffering the same issues over and over, naturally I noticed a pattern, and slowly I began to write them off. Now, whenever I forge a friendship with a Japanese man, it’s been after they’ve proven themselves to me to be outside of the paradigm I’d come to abhor, which is rare I’m sad to say. Syouga-fuckin-nai.

Thus, most of my dealings with Japanese people since I’ve been here has been with women. And, by far, most of the women have been what could be classified as jukujo. And, this has not necessarily been by default. Of course, I’ve met my share of younger girls, too. But, I learned early on, back in my NOVA days even, that jukujo are the best this country has to offer, as far as what I consider to be respectable people (meaning people who respect me or at least themselves) and decent human beings are concerned.

Besides, young girls here, as young girls back home, as young girls worldwide I suspect, have, in general,very little to offer beyond sex appeal. Maybe they can serve as trophies, something to impress your fellow man with. But, here, I’ve found them to be particularly ditsy, useless, like walking personifications of dumb blond jokes, human junk food, and way too much goddamn trouble to get rid of once you’ve realized that there’s nothing going on but kawaii. Clingy as hell.

I think my man Tony over at Soul Of Japan summed up young Japanese girls best here.

But jukujo…most of them anyway, have real life experience. Maybe a kid, an ex-husband, maybe even a current husband (Nova was ripe with married bimajyo on the prowl.) Certainly a job or a career, sometimes even their own businesses. Without a doubt, their own money. They have a better sense of who they are, and what their roles are in a society run by men obsessed with girls dressed up as cartoon characters, french maids or in high school uniforms.

Almost everything I have experienced here in Japan of any value or importance (to me) has been at a Jukujo suggestion or with one by my side. From Onsen, to Temples and Shrines, to trips to other prefectures, to Japanese cooking, museums, Love Hotels,  you name it, a jukujo introduced me to it. My life in Japan has been enhanced significantly by their eagerness to please…and be pleased.

And, it’s a fact…jukujo in Japan look half as young and stay twice as fit as Jukujo back in the States, and usually without surgery… It’s amazing how youthful women here look, well into their late 40s and early 50’s, even. You’re just not gonna get this anywhere else.

Check out all the foreign guys living here and married to Japanese women. Better believe they ain’t married to no young hottie. Hell na! The vast majority got jukujo on their arm, and there is a very good reason for that: They are marriage material.

While some jukujo merely possess a curiosity about foreigners that goes beyond the typical gawking and whispering that people do here, others are dealing with the reality that circumstances have forced them to date and procreate outside their race. Young girls don’t feel that urgency…yet. Nature’s call goes unheard. But, Jukujo hear it loud and clear and if Japanese men are stuck on girls barely out of diapers, then they are faced with two choice: Go gaijin or go Bimajyo. Thank god a good number have gone the former!

So, if anyone out there thought I was on the fence about Jukujo, I hope this post serves as proof that not only am I squarely in Jukujo’s cheering section, smitten as it were, but I’m willing to, as I have in the past I believe, put it as plain as this: Jukujo are the best thing about Japan: PERIOD!

Onsen come a close second, though.


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2 Responses to “Lay off the Jukujo!!!”

  1. FuKnWitU 13 February 2011 at 6:41 pm Permalink

    Nova was ripe with married bimajyo on the prowl

    All English Schools including mine are filled with em'

    I sometimes tell myself it's cuz Ima mother fuckin badass with "fuck me" eyes but I know I could be a manga reading,unhygenic Japan otaku and still score with some of them. It's TOO fucking easy and the easiest ones never get past the trial lesson. These days I like a chase and a woman throwing herself at me just because of where I'm from is a turn off.

    Badass first American second. If your fuck agenda is not in order you will not be permitted entry in to the land of multiple orgasms.

  2. The Envoy 15 February 2011 at 7:41 am Permalink

    Age is merely a relative quantity 🙂

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